Team True Beauty Q&A with Daphne Zuniga
Daphne has been an influential and important part of Team True Beauty
since the very beginning and we couldn't be more grateful. Her
support and voice have had an amazing impact on this movement. She recently took the time to share her thoughts in response to some answers sent to her by the team. We are
honored to share her new empowering advice with all of you!
Hello Team True Beauties. It's been a while! It is mid summer and here are some q&a's we did for you. I would like to share some things I have learned along my path... see if any of it fits you, if not, okay too!
Your TTB friend,
Daphne
Believing in You
"Believing in yourself" doesn't just happen one day and you jump through the air in slow motion with tan skinny legs in the sunshine like some commercial. It happens in bits and pieces, like things happen in life. You'll work hard on a homework assignment and the teacher will read it out loud and you'll feel good about yourself. You'll paint or write or draw something and it will surprise you how good it is. You'll take care of someone and notice how good that makes you feel. Maybe you'll dare to say something that you really feel but haven't said it yet, and afterwards you'll have a little lightness in your step. Any of these things and may more can make us feel good and give us self esteem. Believing in yourself ALWAYS is a result of you, not others. Meaning, if you wear a killer outfit one day and everyone complements you- yay you! But the outfit doesn't reallllllly make YOU the gal wearing it believe in herself, more like it makes you believe in H&M. H&M doesn't need any more self esteem! They are doing just fine. Even though they photoshop their ads making the models way too skinny, the rest of us will NEVER look like them. So let that one go.
Your Own Best Friend, taking care of the scared you.
It may take practice and baby steps to become one's own friend. But it is the most important thing to do! That's what life if for, so just start, and keep trying, we all go through doubt. None of us are safe from the shadow side of being human. Shadow just means the emotions we don't like about ourselves so we keep them down. I had an acting teacher once who said to us, "Imagine seeing a child on the sidewalk, crying. Wouldn't you go up to her and help her? Of course you would." We all have a part of us inside that feels like that child sometimes, but we brush her off, push her aside, try to ignore her, or worse. Haven't you felt like you didn't quite belong, or you weren't good enough just as you are? That's the little girl in my teacher's story, crying and alone. Instead of telling that part of yourself to be quiet, shut up and go away, imagine picking her up holding her and telling her you're right there for her, no matter what. Friends are important, none of us need to do this alone, but the most important part is that you alone start to take care of yourself in vulnerable times. If friends are not treating you well and are not good for your self esteem, you don't need those friends.
Becoming your own friend is a key to happiness I believe. What does that mean? Again, it means listening to the voice that is scared or angry and then taking action to protect and or care for her. It means telling your truth. It means saying no when you mean no, and yes when you want to say yes. Sounds too simple? It's not. It takes practice and baby steps. But know that in time, taking care of yourself, not giving that power to others, will become your natural instinct, AND you will then attract people and circumstances that reflect the care you've given yourself.
Implosion aka taking it out on yourself.
Feelings can implode. That means if you are angry at something or someone out in the world instead of expressing it, and getting it out, you hold the feelings in and take it out on yourself. Implosion is important to watch and to work on changing. Get the feelings out instead of taking them out on yourself. Writing is a good way, or tell someone you trust. When you "get the feelings out" you need to make sure you are doing it in a safe and non violent way. If you want or need professional help, find it.
Being a part of Something bigger
We are a part of something bigger anyway aren't we? And I'm not talking about Twitter! I am talking about this planet, our life on Earth! Taking part, face to face with others is natural to our part in nature. Find a cause you truly believe in, animals, elderly people, outdoors, kids, writing, homelessness, something. I was part of a traveling theater when I was 17, I volunteered tutored kids in east LA while in college. I would look forward to leaving campus and driving across town to the kids in the first grade class I spent the day in. I also went with a group who teaches yoga in elementary school. It was the best part of my day. The environment has always compelled me to take part in different conservation and activist groups. Being a part of something bigger than ourselves makes us feel the happiness of being connected, and helping to improve the quality of life on Earth.
And Remember: No one is perfect, we all have our "stuff" but life is about transformation, we all grow toward total self love, so start wherever you are. You are worthy right the h*ll now. Right now. Make the choice to move toward self love. Why not? You got somewhere else to go today?
Big strong hug,
Daphne
Hello Team True Beauties. It's been a while! It is mid summer and here are some q&a's we did for you. I would like to share some things I have learned along my path... see if any of it fits you, if not, okay too!
Your TTB friend,
Daphne
Believing in You
"Believing in yourself" doesn't just happen one day and you jump through the air in slow motion with tan skinny legs in the sunshine like some commercial. It happens in bits and pieces, like things happen in life. You'll work hard on a homework assignment and the teacher will read it out loud and you'll feel good about yourself. You'll paint or write or draw something and it will surprise you how good it is. You'll take care of someone and notice how good that makes you feel. Maybe you'll dare to say something that you really feel but haven't said it yet, and afterwards you'll have a little lightness in your step. Any of these things and may more can make us feel good and give us self esteem. Believing in yourself ALWAYS is a result of you, not others. Meaning, if you wear a killer outfit one day and everyone complements you- yay you! But the outfit doesn't reallllllly make YOU the gal wearing it believe in herself, more like it makes you believe in H&M. H&M doesn't need any more self esteem! They are doing just fine. Even though they photoshop their ads making the models way too skinny, the rest of us will NEVER look like them. So let that one go.
Your Own Best Friend, taking care of the scared you.
It may take practice and baby steps to become one's own friend. But it is the most important thing to do! That's what life if for, so just start, and keep trying, we all go through doubt. None of us are safe from the shadow side of being human. Shadow just means the emotions we don't like about ourselves so we keep them down. I had an acting teacher once who said to us, "Imagine seeing a child on the sidewalk, crying. Wouldn't you go up to her and help her? Of course you would." We all have a part of us inside that feels like that child sometimes, but we brush her off, push her aside, try to ignore her, or worse. Haven't you felt like you didn't quite belong, or you weren't good enough just as you are? That's the little girl in my teacher's story, crying and alone. Instead of telling that part of yourself to be quiet, shut up and go away, imagine picking her up holding her and telling her you're right there for her, no matter what. Friends are important, none of us need to do this alone, but the most important part is that you alone start to take care of yourself in vulnerable times. If friends are not treating you well and are not good for your self esteem, you don't need those friends.
Becoming your own friend is a key to happiness I believe. What does that mean? Again, it means listening to the voice that is scared or angry and then taking action to protect and or care for her. It means telling your truth. It means saying no when you mean no, and yes when you want to say yes. Sounds too simple? It's not. It takes practice and baby steps. But know that in time, taking care of yourself, not giving that power to others, will become your natural instinct, AND you will then attract people and circumstances that reflect the care you've given yourself.
Implosion aka taking it out on yourself.
Feelings can implode. That means if you are angry at something or someone out in the world instead of expressing it, and getting it out, you hold the feelings in and take it out on yourself. Implosion is important to watch and to work on changing. Get the feelings out instead of taking them out on yourself. Writing is a good way, or tell someone you trust. When you "get the feelings out" you need to make sure you are doing it in a safe and non violent way. If you want or need professional help, find it.
Being a part of Something bigger
We are a part of something bigger anyway aren't we? And I'm not talking about Twitter! I am talking about this planet, our life on Earth! Taking part, face to face with others is natural to our part in nature. Find a cause you truly believe in, animals, elderly people, outdoors, kids, writing, homelessness, something. I was part of a traveling theater when I was 17, I volunteered tutored kids in east LA while in college. I would look forward to leaving campus and driving across town to the kids in the first grade class I spent the day in. I also went with a group who teaches yoga in elementary school. It was the best part of my day. The environment has always compelled me to take part in different conservation and activist groups. Being a part of something bigger than ourselves makes us feel the happiness of being connected, and helping to improve the quality of life on Earth.
And Remember: No one is perfect, we all have our "stuff" but life is about transformation, we all grow toward total self love, so start wherever you are. You are worthy right the h*ll now. Right now. Make the choice to move toward self love. Why not? You got somewhere else to go today?
Big strong hug,
Daphne